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See Ying aka samantha aka 황시영
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Reminiscing

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  • Thursday, August 06, 2009

    Haiz...
    Prob, prob and more probs!
    I really try to face it myself.
    bt... i dunno.

    Today, went bk hme.
    sis told me this and tat.
    bt wat i can do?
    i know u can't tak it.
    i understand.
    she giv attitude i also understand.

    bt wat abt me?
    do anyone know how i feeling?
    i kp it inside myself.
    and try to face everyone with a smile.
    probably it a real/fake 1.
    idk. I know u wan it be bk lik it used to be.
    me too. i wan it be bck lik it used to be too.
    can we rush? we can't rush also.

    seriously i wan go thailand also.
    bt i din even ask whether i can go.
    coz i know it probably a no.
    so i din ask. my cliques are all goin.
    i'm happy tat they can go.
    bt also sad i can't. ):

    Sumtime i really envy ppl.
    why ppl can hav all e best tings.
    bt it nvr happen 4 me nor my family.
    i'm despressed as well.
    i dunno wen i wil actually broke dwn.
    seriously.

    sumtime i feel life is so boring.
    i know u're despressed.
    unhappy, and cry several times.
    bt actually i gt e same feeling as u too.
    it whether i show 2 u anot.
    i try to put a brave front in front of mum.
    i dun1 her to worry.
    i know she picky stubborn at time.
    bt wat to do? she sick we nd to giv in.

    i know u do alot of tings.
    such as cooking, tc of her at hme.
    coz u're having ur holis now.
    no life 4 u. i know.
    i'm sorry. actually i'm afraid to tc of mum alone too.
    idk why either.
    how i wish there sum1 to tc of her.
    bt we cant. we gt no $ to hire a nanny.
    nor there really sum1 who so free to tc of her.

    i'm really scared wenever my right eyelid twitched too.
    i scared tat sumtime bad happen.
    i fear 4 everything.
    coz i'm scared.
    i'm useless i tink.
    bt wat can i do?
    haven hav a gd slp since tat time.

    I really wish to hav happy life.
    back like it used to be.
    bt i wonder how long and how to?
    why i nd to face all this.
    whereas others is probably having fun out there?
    i pray tat everything wil be back 2 normal real real real soon!
    PLEASE!!! i'm afraid i may break dwn soon.
    DD:

    i wonder hw i goin 2 fare in my exam.
    with so many probs in me.
    i scared i wil flunk my test.
    i even lost sum interest in watching my kr drama too.
    wat happen?
    depression? haiz. i really hope there a angel 2 help me.
    sumtime i wan 2 find sum1 to talk to.
    bt who? who wil really understand hw i feel?
    and who wil find time to listen to my woes?

    and seriously i hope u listen 2 us.
    and dun be so picky and stubborn anymore.
    sincerely hope so.


    Let's me juz pray and hope tings wil turn out well 4 us!
    I HOPE!!!
    ♥ Yiing--황시영 ♥

    | Thursday, August 06, 2009 |