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See Ying aka samantha aka 황시영
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    • Monday, August 10, 2009

    Eh~
    how to strt?
    yst i still moody.
    coz too many tings happen.
    really too many.
    till i can't handle.

    sis can't too.
    told cousin and sp abt it.
    and they say giv more concern.
    i try. i gave.
    bt wat i get in return?
    i wonder why is old ppl so stubborn?
    why why why?

    Bad bad yr 4 me!
    i hate yr 09.
    no happiness and oni more sorrow.
    wat is tis?
    why is it lik tat?
    why me why me why me?
    i can oni blame my life.
    & nthin else.

    i know i'm way too moody.
    i am trying to cheer up.
    i'm trying. & tryin very hard.
    i tel cousin i hope my 2nd aunt can stay over.
    coz i'm scared.
    idk why either.
    today 3plus morning woke up.
    and i'm shivering.
    coz of wat she did.

    i try to giv in 2 her.
    bt sum ting cannot giv in.
    it wil harm her.
    she juz believe herself.
    and being so stubborn.
    nt wanting to heed ani1 advice.
    probably oni my 2nd aunt.

    seriously i dun1 trouble my 2nd aunt.
    she alr 60yr old.
    and she take care of my mum who is 6yrs younger.
    bt wat 2 do?
    she stubborn stubborn & stubborn.
    she dun tel us wen she is uncomfortable.
    she dun say.
    we are nt her we wun know.

    no matter hw i try talking 2 her.
    she still wun say.
    she definitely nt listening 2 sis & my advice too.
    at times i really very helpless.
    wen i tel relatives abt mum prob.
    they try 2 act up 4 me.
    coz i know if mum noe i e 1 who say it out.
    she gonna yell at me.
    i can oni say e oni ting she can do is HELP HERSELF.
    i hope she do. and does so soon.

    I really really hope.
    bt i really nt sure how long it wil take.
    how long more sis and i nd to be moody.
    i'm trying to cheer up.
    sis too. bt wenever i tot tings gonna be better.
    it turn worst. idk why either too.
    challenges 4 us?

    Today actually wanna go out with sp see her zaizai.
    & i gt alot of tings wan 2 tel her.
    bt i din went.
    coz sumting cropped up.
    a very impt 1.
    & report nt done.
    work nt revised.
    everyting is not touch yet.
    i wonder how i'm goin 2 cope.
    & how long i can cope.
    i really wonder.

    yst my 2 nieces came over.
    really nt much mood 2 play with them.
    they are so adorable. bt i gt no mood.
    i control bt my tears still it flow dwn.
    right in front of my nieces & cousin.
    i tink i really need a angel to help me.
    i really need. i can't afford 2 lose my mum.
    bt i can't afford 2 be sad everyday.
    and can't afford 2 lose my slp.
    i really dunno wat and how.

    some1 pls.
    cum and help us out.
    help us get out of this dark hole.
    it too deep and we can't climb out ourselves.
    we are frightened as it too dark.
    we need a lending hand.
    sum1 who can lead us out of tat bloody dark hole.
    who can? pls cum and save us.

    i know my post is very very moody.
    alot ppl asking me to cheer up.
    and dun worry too much.
    bt e biggest prob is how to?
    i may be smiling in front of u all.
    bt in my heart i'm actually crying.
    i wan to be strong.
    bt sumtime i really can't. ):

    yes i know i muz look positively.
    i should i must. i know.
    bt pls give us sum light on how to.
    still thanks frenzs, cousin 4 asking me 2 cheer up.
    be strong. i try. seriously i wil try okay.

    maybe i should turn back time.
    to change everything.
    which is totally impossible.
    i juz wish everything wil be fine back again.
    i pray.
    ♥ Yiing--황시영 ♥

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    | Monday, August 10, 2009 |